The lead star of a Detective series called "The Gourmet Detective" is found shot dead during an after show party. The only clue is a spangly boot which leads the commander and chief of the local police force to suspect that the perpetrator of the crime is a seventies style criminal. Informing modern day "nineties" copper David Spanker that he must team up with a crew of various...
Jed, a New York cop,brings home the last Christmas turkey in the shop for his wife Sue. Unfortunately they make a dramatic discovery whilst stuffing it - namely that it is not dead. Thetturkey then takes the pair hostage,demanding that English turkey farmer Bernard Matthews releases all his birds in exchange for the couple's freedom. Although things do not go according to plan ...
Governor Wilkins brings rookie cop Lucille Bromley to see the imprisoned cannibal Dr Genghis in order to gain information about a serial killer. At the same time the extremely boring Gregory Dawson,who is interested in serial killers,is building his own torture chamber and making a very mundane video diary about his life. However the two worlds are shortly about to collide. Wri...
Billy and Stan are two security van personnel who go about their daily lives. Billy is a slow minded yet soft hearted guy while his friend Stan is an even more slow witted bloke who's behavior borders on that of an infantile delinquent. Stan has been having a romance with Frances, an Ornithologist who he has been speaking with on his CB radio. Frances is on a bird watching expe...
Teen-age gang leaders Passion and Little Sister are released from prison,only to find that their gang the Slags have disbanded due to rival gang,the Hawaiians,who wear garlands and drink Pina Coladas. The psychotic Slags regroup for a showdown with the Hawaiians at the local swimming pool but matters are complicated when Little Sister falls in love with Hawaiians leader Ricky,t...
Janie,daughter of Commander Jackson,the head of D15,has been kidnapped and there are only two men who can save her - former agents Bonehead and Foyle,now working as actors at Tv's Tough Guys school. Hunky,hairy and always scantily clad,they are blackmailed into returning to work and,since they have no car and are sometimes turned off buses,they run everywhere. Finally,during th...
When American comic actor Steve 'Zoo Zoo Zoo Off Come My Pants' Wild arrives in Oxford to make a comedy film his poetry-loving girlfriend Caroline goes behind his back to enrol on a course studying Byron's poetry. Hannah Van Hosenstratt comes from New Orleans for the course but is tricked into believing she has a place by the dean,who seduces her, and she can make no headway wi...
In the conclusion of this special two-part story. Stan has somehow managed to make it to the Falklands, which have indeed been taken over by the Argentinians after all. He is tied to a stake alongside Frances who he has finally met and been captured with. The pair are sentenced to death by dictator, General Galtieri. Stan, in a desperate attempt to stall for time, recounts how ...
From the Hollywood production team that gave the world ' The Strike'comes yet another block-buster. In this Ken Livingstone,played by Charles Bronson,elected leader of the G.L.C.,successfully prevents the evil Tories from flooding Lndon in order to turn it into a yacht club before battling,single-handed,against the wicked Ice Maiden,also known as Margaret Thatcher to stop her f...
Carl Moss leaves jail,where he has taken the rap for his evil twin Sterling,and has been declared a model prisoner. Pauline Sneek,his probation officer - and girlfriend - gets him community work teaching youngsters how to lead law-abiding lives. This displeases Sterling,as he needs young delinquents for his bicycle stealing ring,and there is a showdown which results in the deat...
Patrick is a director of avant-garde music videos. Whilst at a UB40 concert he walks into what he believes to be a portable toilet but is actually a matter transportation pod being used for an illegal experiment. As a result his personality is changed to that of a yobbish,Cockney Arsenal supporter. Written by don @ minifie-1
Paul,a former miner,writes a hard-hitting left wing screenplay about the 1984 miners' strike. It is accepted by a Hollywood film company but gets turned into a distorted action film in which Arthur Scargill,portrayed by Al Pacino with Meryl Streep as his wife,performs motor-cycle stunts,rescues his daughter from a flooded mine and saves his pit from closure after an impassioned...
Jessica,the second Mrs Saunders,arrives with her new husband John at his country estate. Very much left to her own devices she is unnerved by the power that Consuela,the sinister Spanish housekeeper,seems to wield,comparing her unfavourably to John's first wife and forbidding her to enter a mysterious locked room. Only Richard,the understanding estate manager,seems to be on her...
Fleeing the police petty thief Gino is sheltered by embittered playwright Bill before stealing a taxi and picking up fares,the last one being party girl Angie,who has collapsed in a drunken heap on the back seat. Seeing the Wanted posters for Gino they go on the run,accidentally killing a chicken farmer and stealing money and identities until they are tracked down to a hotel wh...
Whilst delivering toilet rolls to a recording studio small time crook Keith pockets a demo tape by newly disbanded group Toy Department,which he takes to a promoter, Brian. Together they have a chart hit with the 'mystery' group but complications arise when Brian wants a live tour - which involves Keith fire-bombing the venues - and then a personal appearance by the group. With...
